….

Dear study gods.  I’ve been thinking a lot, mostly because I am paranoid like a smart thief, that I won’t do so hot to trot in my classes.  I never cared about school much before but always did relatively well without trying any and now that I’m getting older I feel this whole “try hard” thing and to be completely 100% honest with you– it fucking sucks and makes me anxious about failure.  In my late twenties & only now I’m thinking about failing to live up to expectations.  I guess if that’s the case I’ve had it pretty easy cheese thus far and now I should gas up the pedal while I still got some sort of momentum going.

Dear creative gods.  I think you left when I became humble.  V says that to really make it, one must be somewhat delusional.  It’s true.  When I was at the top of my creativity and I could churn out beautiful sentences with concise diction and incredible analogies like factory-made parts, shiny and perfect and sturdy everytime.  Now I’m humble & I’m losing the most identifying characteristic of me, that I’m the world’s greatest gift to humanity in charms, fun, hilarity, cuteness, & overall fascination.  Now my goal is to reclaim being the world’s best white elephant gift without feeling suicidal all the time.  Thank you and hope to see you tomorrow.

Advertisements

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s